Scotch and Sirens

Chapter Nineteen

 

Darcy was returning with glasses in his hands just when Brougham led Miss Bennet to their party. He was glad to see that they seemed to have had a good time together, but he was also relieved that the dance had ended and he could secure his place by Elizabeth’s side.

“Miss Bennet, Miss Tournier, I thought you two might feel the need for some refreshment.”

Brougham let his excellent mood show for anyone to see. Miss Bennet’s repartee had proved a charming respite. As he now assumed that Darcy might prefer to partake of some of her charms himself, he smiled at Miss Tournier and began to lead her away while engaging her in conversation, leaving Miss Bennet to converse with his friend.

“Thank you, Mr. Darcy. You have surmised correctly in my case,” Elizabeth said taking the punch from his outstretched hand. “I have discovered Lord Brougham has a wish to be acquainted with more of his neighbours. If we are to help him in this endeavour I feel we must only introduce him to those who would not call on him each and every day. I think that would be a kindness to help him maintain some sense of the solitude that he seems to have lost upon meeting us.”

Darcy smiled to Elizabeth.

“I believe my friend proved to be an ideal partner. He enjoys the opinion of London society as being a favourite addition to every gathering.”

“Yes, I can see why he is your friend. He has an ease about his conversation. As the expectations of society go, no one would find him wanting.” She paused, thinking for a moment. “I find that I prefer a dancing partner who has both grace in his of movements and in his conversation.”

Darcy was just wondering if he was more content that Elizabeth seemed to have enjoyed her dance with Brougham or stressed by not being certain if he himself was fulfilling her expectations, when Miss Lucy joined their company.

“It seems you both enjoyed your activity on the dance floor,” she said. “I hope to have such an accomplished partner myself this evening. I observed that you dance very well, Mr. Darcy.”

“Thank you, Miss Lucy. It is the perfect time for me to hear some kind words, since it seems extremely difficult to meet Miss Bennet’s standards.”

“Truly? You mistook my meaning somehow, Mr. Darcy? Well, it is completely understandable that you might be lacking in comprehension at the moment. You must be very tired out from such excellent dancing by now and might need a short rest period from the amusement,” she smiled at him and then turned her attention to Lucy.

“Yes, I did enjoy the dancing very much. Thank you for asking, Miss Lucy.”

Darcy had trouble concealing his smile upon hearing Elizabeth’s remark. He would mention that she yet again chose to purposefully misunderstand him, if the sight of her eyes flashing with stubbornness was not so disarming. He resolved then to wait for Miss Lucy’s response.

Lucy had caught the slight territorial meaning behind Lizzy's chosen words, and she wondered if Mr. Darcy did. He probably had not. She thought men were usually slow to understand such things. No matter. Based on what he had just said, she did not think he would care, and he was likely to not be as pleased with his present company as she thought he might be. Encouraged by that, she thought perhaps now would be a good time to begin.

She focused on Mr. Darcy's last statement, chose her words carefully, and then spoke, looking first at him.

“Why, it is well known around here that Miss Bennet is rather discerning. If that were not so we might be addressing her quite differently, even as we speak.” She turned her gaze to Lizzy now. “But then I am sure Miss Bennet knows what I mean.”

“I assure you I do not, Miss Lucy,” she answered, a bit confused at the direction the girl was taking in her effort to humiliate her.

“Oh, I am sorry. I was thinking it would be a joke amongst friends, but I see you do not understand my reference. Let us forget it, shall we?”

Her curiosity now peaked, Lizzy impulsively took up the proffered challenge implied in the question. “Certainly, if you wish it. Perhaps your joke is too obscure?”

Lucy smiled sweetly but strived to appear slightly embarrassed, clasping her hands together and looking down for a bit. “I do not wish to gain a reputation for being an inauspicious host who confuses her guests. Since Mr. Darcy likely knows all about it – well, since everyone seems to – and since we are among friends… Oh, I am embarrassed. I am sure you will both laugh when you discover I was only meaning to tease you for almost being called Mrs. Collins.”

This time Darcy really could hardly comprehend what he had just heard. Did Elizabeth turn down Mr. Collins? How was it possible that that ridiculous man could have ever thought about making Elizabeth his wife?! A cold shiver run through his body when he had realised what it could have meant if she had not declined him. But she had, and this thought was a genuine and sobering relief. He glanced at her as if looking for confirmation of this thought.

Lizzy was stunned. Lucy was not even talking about her silly, rash words that she had spoken about Mr. Darcy the other night. This was something else. She wondered how she knew about it and what Mr. Darcy would think.

Not knowing what to say, for there were no words that could diffuse the embarrassment Lizzy felt nor point out the odd trick that Lucy had so skilfully played on her, she stumbled out with, “I am sure I do not know what you mean. I...”

Lucy watched Mr. Darcy as he processed the information she had so helpfully provided, and she took it as an encouraging sign. Lizzy was stammering, so there was no threat from that quarter. She seized the opportunity, turned back to Miss Bennet and continued her attack.

“I had assumed it was you who had turned him down.” Keeping an innocent look on her face she said, “Oh, Miss Bennet, I am so sorry. I did not think. I assumed you had turned him down, but he must have rescinded his offer because of the actions of your sister, Miss Lydia. The shared disgrace would have changed his mind. I am so sorry! I should never have mentioned it... If my sister had run off with a man, I... I am sorry! No wonder you came to Scotland…” she stammered effectively, and then watched and waited for her fine work to have its effect.

Lizzy was frozen in place. The shock had to be evident on her face, but she could do nothing about it. There was no quick recovery for her here. She was ruined for sure now. The whole neighbourhood would hear, and even the fact that Lydia did finally marry would mean nothing to them if they knew of the other first.

Her thoughts then went from bad to worse. This scandal was the very thing that had so appalled Mr. Darcy before and caused him to quit her company in Lambton. Lucy’s mention of it would most certainly have the same result once he realised that all of the neighbours would know of it. Before, he might have felt his reputation to be safe here so far north. Now, he would not even wish to be her friend. And what if he wondered now if his own proposal was also generally talked of? He could not feel safe if the other one was known.

She simply stared off into the distance, avoiding Mr. Darcy's eyes, and said nothing. She was mortified. Lucy had won. The girl may not gain the husband she was after, but she had most certainly delivered a most devastating blow to her other intended victim. Lucy had won revenge at least.

This new bit of information, spoken as easily as one would an invitation to a luncheon, did not have any effect on Darcy, however, the sight of Elizabeth’s distress did. He felt growing anger and his only wish was to end this conversation at once. He looked at the offending lady and spoke to her most coldly.

“Miss Lucy, as I have told you before, Miss Bennet and I are well acquainted and so are our families. I am very sorry if I put an end to the amusement of your neighbours, but I hardly see any sense in your words. There is no reason for which Miss Bennet would be obliged to accept any offer of marriage. Also, you seem not to be informed that Mr. Collins was an engaged man last autumn and married early this year. I sincerely doubt if he or his wife would agree with your intelligence. Both Miss Bennet and I had the pleasure to visit them last Easter, and let me assure you that they seemed to be very content with their situation. Miss Lydia Bennet has recently married as well, to a Mr. Wickham, my very old acquaintance. As you see, the stories you were told lack any logic, which only proves how creative people can be when there is nothing else entertaining enough to occupy their minds.”

If Lizzy had been stunned before, words could not express what she was feeling now. She would have hugged Mr. Darcy for his kindness if it has been possible. That he would describe Mr. Wickham in such a way, knowing how he must feel about that man, only to save the situation for her said a lot about how far he would go for a friend. She could not believe that she had doubted him only a moment before. Could she have been wrong about why he had left her in Lambton? It seemed she continually misjudged so many things where he was concerned. It should not surprise her if she were wrong about him once again. She would have to think more about that. Later.

Now she could only stand there and listen. Trusting the situation to him, but placing a smile on her face so as not to allow Lucy any satisfaction if possible.

“I am very sorry. It seems I was heavily mistaken. Please, accept my apologies, Miss Bennet. It seems that words, which were intended to convey friendship and understanding, unwittingly had quite the opposite effect. Mr. Darcy, I must thank you for pointing out my error.”

Lucy resolved that it was time then to strengthen her position, which seemed a bit precarious at the moment, and use some of her remaining ammunition. Casting doubts in Mr. Darcy’s mind about Miss Bennet, ones that would sit there and stew, hopefully causing eventual mischief, was the most she could hope for at present considering his reaction thus far.

“Please let me make amends for my error in judgement. There are many eligible ladies here this evening. Perhaps you would like to be introduced to some of them, Mr. Darcy?”

He raised an eyebrow in question, but made no comment.

Lucy laughed. “I see your confusion so I realise I err again. I was sure Miss Bennet had told me that you were here to find a wife, Mr. Darcy, but now I see she was only teasing.” Lucy smiled innocently at Lizzy. “Why, Miss Bennet, you even had me feeling sorry for him and I thought to help introduce him around this evening.” Turning to Mr. Darcy she added, “I should have known, for I could not fathom that a man who has as much to recommend himself in terms of personality as you do would be as desperate as was implied. Miss Bennet is simply too witty at times, but then I am sure you already know that about her, you both being so well acquainted.”

Darcy felt crestfallen by what had been said. He thought he was prepared for it, but he did not expect to hear that Elizabeth thought him desperate. However, he recalled how sorry she was for ever saying so, and he had promised he would withstand the confrontation. He now faked his smile and answered.

“Miss Lucy, Miss Bennet dearly loves teasing me. To the extent that I can never tell in which direction her lively mind will take her. I cannot say that I do not like the particular attention she pays me, nor that I am surprised. I have learnt long ago that Miss Bennet likes expressing opinions which are not her own.”

Lizzy had been watching him as closely as her current state of embarrassment would allow while Lucy spoke. She could see that he was hurt.

She had to say something in her own defence. She could no longer stand here keeping silent, not when she had wounded him by her thoughtless words yet again – and all on a silly whim. When he had finished speaking, she broke her silence.

“Miss Lucy, I have already admitted to Mr. Darcy that I played a silly, thoughtless prank on you both, and I have apologised. I find however, that your own sense of humour this evening is just as askew as my own was when I spoke as I did. Perhaps we both need a new guide for it?”

She was tired of this conversation and mortified beyond words. She was no longer willing or able to stand here and be civil to such an uncivil woman. She could not even guess at what Mr. Darcy was thinking, but she could not bear to wait and find out the worst. She needed some air.

“Excuse me. It seems I am wanted on the other side of the room,” and she walked away, going directly across the parlour and out the door into the garden, not even looking behind her to see if they saw the lie in her flimsy excuse to make her exit.

 

 

Lizzy paced the garden path that ran between two benches. She had wandered some distance from the house, but could still see by the light that came from the windows.

Would she never learn? If she was not jumping to conclusions, then she was saying all of the wrong things. She kept watching the door from the house. She had half wished he would follow her but knew that he would not. Oh, why had she left? Why was she so impulsive?

Well, there was nothing for it! She would have to let him go, for she could not keep allowing him to be hurt over and over again because of her actions. She would tell him that she understood their being friends would be impossible for him now, that she was simply not worth his efforts, that she thanked him for his kind words given in her defence, but that she understood it would be better for him if they no longer communicated.

He had been too good and kind to her all of these months – when she had been guilty of saying so many unpardonable things. She loved him. She knew that now. She had known it before she had left Longbourn. She would have to let him go for his sake. It could not go anywhere anyway, and she was just playing a dangerous game with herself by thinking that she could be his friend and do it well. That she could be happy with only that was a deception, and she could no longer lie to herself.

She continued to pace, beyond caring if anyone saw her or missed her presence in the house.

 

 

Darcy excused himself from Miss Lucy’s company and went to the table with refreshments. He served himself a drink and looked around. He had hoped Elizabeth would return soon. Seeing she did not wish company, he was afraid to impose himself on her. Brougham was occupied with Mrs. Tournier and Miss Tournier was just now joining them. He hardly knew anyone else here and did not really desire to alter this situation. With his drink in hand, he started to walk around the room. He was watching the couples dance for some time, but when half an hour passed and there was still no sign of Elizabeth he started to worry.

He took a glass of wine for her and went into the garden. He was startled when he did not see her on the terrace, and so went along the path that led among the trees, letting his eyes slowly adjust to the darkness. He finally saw her walking silently back and forth. Hesitantly, he approached and started to speak.

“Miss Bennet, excuse my interruption. I understand that you wish to be alone and I would not like to impose myself on you, but you have been outside for quite some time and I started to worry. Please, I brought you a glass of wine. I do not have to stay if you do not wish me to. I only wanted to know if you felt well.”

She had stopped her pacing when she had heard his voice but did not turn around toward him when he spoke. She could not. She knew if she saw his face she would lose her resolve. With her back still to him, she began.

“Mr. Darcy, I thank you for your kind words in my defence that you gave to Lucy, but I am sure they cost you dearly. I know it is impossible for you to feel those words in truth, and it will not be long before Lucy repeats her story of me, inaccuracies and all, to the whole neighbourhood. Lydia's disgrace, and therefore my own, can only have a negative effect on yourself should you remain my friend. I think you realised that in Lambton that day, and I did not blame you then, as I would not blame you now. I cannot bear to be the one responsible for causing you any more pain than I have already. Please, do not concern yourself with me any longer. You must not for your own sake.”

Darcy listened in silence. He was not sure what to say in order not to reveal his involvement in Miss Lydia’s marriage. Finally, he decided that Elizabeth was only feeling depressed and it was not the proper time for a serious conversation. He would rather try to calm her and bring her back inside before she was missed.

“Miss Bennet, I am not certain what you are talking about, but I think a serious talk of this kind is not what you currently need. If you want to ask more questions of me we can speak of it tomorrow. However, for now, you need to calm down. Miss Lucy’s words were very unkind and I can see how they might have grieved you.”

As she still had not moved, he walked around her to face her.

“Miss Bennet, you may think me harsh, but I will have no resistance from you at the moment. You have spent far too long a time here. You are cold and shivering. Please, you need to drink the wine.”

She took the glass from him and he took off his jacket to wrap over her shoulders.

“Here. You need to warm up your body and cool your emotions before we go back. We cannot spend any more time away if you do not wish to stir up gossip, but I wish to say something first. I want to thank you for your friendship, but I would thank you more if you gave me more credit. Now, I want to see the Miss Bennet I know, with her chin raised up and confidence in her eyes.”

Darcy offered her his arm and softly spoke, “Shall we?”

She stood there listening to him and was at first confused by his words. He had to know what she was talking about. How could he not? But as he continued to speak she realised he was right. She had wished to get this over quickly because she was an impulsive person thinking with her emotions. He was talking with a cooler head, and he was right. They could not stay here. She had been gone too long already.

Until he placed his coat on her shoulders, she had not realised how cold she had been. She felt the warmth of it, still radiating the heat of his body. She held it closer to herself and listened to his last words. It was no use. She could not carry out her resolve under these conditions, him looking so earnestly at her and holding out his arm for her to take. Tomorrow would be better, when she had some distance between them and something of his was not enclosing her body so intimately. She took his arm and they began their walk back to the house.

“You are right Mr. Darcy. We should return to the party. I thank you for your coat and your cool head. I will endeavour to do as you request. I will put my chin up and show the confidence that I do not currently feel.”

Darcy stopped just when they were about to approach the lit area and took his jacket from her.

“Miss Bennet, before we enter the house I want you to do two things for me. First, I want you to promise to come to our lesson tomorrow morning and let me answer all the questions you could not ask now. Second, I recall you once saying there is stubbornness about you, and that you can never bear to be frightened by the will of others. Your courage always rises with every attempt to intimidate you. I will hold you to your own words now and ask for a smile.”

She smiled at him. At first it was very weak, but when he smiled back genuinely her eyes glittered with a much stronger one. He took her trembling hand and bent to warm it with a light kiss from his lips. Overwhelmed by the shiver that had now become his also, he looked into her eyes, shyly at first, but with the same caress that accompanied his touch.

“Thank you, Miss Bennet, for the smile and for your trust. They both mean a lot to me.”

They moved toward the house with lighter hearts, and found Brougham was standing on the terrace looking out at them.

“Are you looking for us, Brougham? Do you enjoy yourself at the party or do you require my assistance for your full satisfaction?”

“Well, at the moment I am a man on a mission, and thankfully I have now done my duty and can relate my message to you from Mrs. Tournier. It seems, Miss Bennet, that Miss Tournier is quite tired from this evening and your aunt has requested that I take her home. Miss Tournier wishes you to accompany her. Your aunt has expressed a wish to stay.

“ Please, let me take you to her now, and I will order my carriage to the door.”

Darcy hesitated, looking at Elizabeth before saying, “Very well, Brougham. I think you can relay Miss Bennet’s positive answer to Mrs. Tournier. But before your carriage is ready I would ask Miss Bennet to give me the pleasure of seeing her shine in a dance once more this evening. We will join you soon after.”

Darcy led Elizabeth to the dance floor. Seeing her confusion he smiled sheepishly.

“I hope you will forgive my asking you to dance again and in such a manner, but I did not want to leave some people here under the impression that you have any reason to leave the party too soon.”

He did not say anything more, nor did she, but he hoped his warm smile and attention would add to her confidence. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Miss Lucy watching them from afar, which only proved his assumptions right.

 

 

Miss Lucy was shocked by what she saw from her hiding place in the garden. Her hopes fell as she observed the actions of the man before her.

She had not seen where Lizzy had gone as she had been focusing on Mr. Darcy, and not Miss Bennet, when she had left so abruptly. She was ecstatic that she had been so successful at taking Lizzy down a notch and was sure that Mr. Darcy would begin having second thoughts about that woman now. Not that she expected him to instantly turn to her, yet the dissention had been planted and the chance was there. Even when he had excused himself so quickly after they were left alone, Lucy was still cautiously optimistic, after all it was understandable that he would require a moment to appraise the news.

She had watched him from across the room while she reviewed the conversation in her head. She worried that she had tried to accomplish too much too quickly. Time was never on her side where eligible visitors to the neighbourhood were concerned. This limitation would be her downfall in the end if she could not make something happen for herself soon. She was two and twenty! Time was against her in more ways than one.

She did not think she had gone too far in this instance though, because she had caught a glimpse of something that was questionable on his face after she had let slip what Miss Bennet had said. But then, as she observed him continue to look toward the door to the garden, she began to doubt her own victory being achieved quite so easily. She had looked about for Lizzy herself, but could not find her anywhere inside the house. It was obvious the girl had gone that way, and he was waiting for her to return. At least that is what it seemed to her.

This did not bode well for herself at all. Especially when, after some time had passed, he left through those same doors alone with a fresh glass of wine in his hand. She had waited a few moments, debating with herself, and then had slipped across the room and followed. She thought that if he could not find Miss Bennet, then perhaps he would accidentally find a most willing Miss Lucy Steele instead!

Upon arriving outside she had not seen him anywhere, and so she had walked quickly down the path toward the trees until she finally spotted the tall man further along talking to Miss Bennet near the benches. She had quickly moved off to the side and made her way along the back of the row of trees so that she would not bee seen. Although she could hear their voices she could not get close enough to understand what was being said. It mattered little though, because her shock began immediately as she observed Mr. Darcy’s compassionate movements in conjunction with the caring tone in his voice. She saw him walk around Miss Bennet and tenderly drape his coat over her shoulders. Lucy looked on in dismay as he held his arm out for her to take and quickly ducked behind a tree as the pair made their way back to the house.

He took such care of her, and yet they were not engaged. It must be an old friendship indeed, or… Perhaps she should have been cultivating a friendship with Miss Bennet all along instead of the approach she had taken. Maybe it was not too late? She would need to further peruse the matter, but as she made her way back to the house she thought it just might be hopeless as far as her chances with that man were concerned, unless of course Miss Bennet proved to be as blind as she seemed to be now. Only time would tell. Lucy’s one consoling thought was, that if she had nothing else, she at least had that.

 

 

As soon as the dance ended Lizzy and Darcy joined the others.

“Good evening, Mrs. Tournier,” Darcy greeted her. “I have not yet had the pleasure of speaking with you tonight. I hope, however, that that will soon be amended, as Miss Tournier was kind enough to invite us to tea at Rosefarm.

“I am glad to hear that you are enjoying the assembly. Although, I must support Miss Tournier in her wish to return home earlier, I too am not very fond of crowded gatherings.”

Holly managed a smile at Mr. Darcy's comment, “I must admit, Mr. Darcy, that I have enjoyed as much of this gathering as I care to, and I am quite ready to go home.”

Darcy smiled at her remark. “Why, Miss Tournier, I think that nothing is left for me but to acknowledge that you have just bested me in my diplomatic skills. I must say, Brougham, that we are very lucky that women are not taking their education at Cambridge. We would lose far more contests than just the mathematic one.”

Holly raised an eyebrow at this. “Mr. Darcy, Lord Brougham, you lost a mathematic contest?”

The gentlemen exchanged amused smiles.

“We both did, indeed,” Darcy answered. “In fact it was the only important contest which was not won by one of us. However, it was revealed recently that the final verdict was not based upon our mathematical skills, but rather a diplomatic decision of the jury. It seems that our honourable professors were worried about our ongoing rivalry and decided that our friendship would be safer without the trial of wills. On the other hand, there was another man worthy of the notice, and the prize went to him.”

“Ah, your professors were wise men. A true friendship is indeed a thing to protect and cherish. Some things are worth preserving, no matter what the cost to ourselves or our pride.”

Darcy glanced at Elizabeth and smiled. “I would hope that true friendship would have survived then, even if the winner had been one of us.”

Lizzy listened quietly to the others talk until it was announced to them that the coach was ready.

The women sat on one side and the men on the other, Mr. Darcy across from Lizzy. They each stole glances at one another, but looked elsewhere when it seemed prudent to finally do so. Lizzy remained quiet for the duration, smiling when a smile was called for, but all in all the talk was rather sparse.

When they finally arrived at Rosefarm, and the men had seen them to the door, both she and Holly wordlessly agreed to save any talking for the morning.

Lizzy went to her room, readied herself for bed and then took a seat by the window, resting her head on the cool pane of glass. She did not know if she would be able to sleep this night at all.

She spent some time in that position, the cool windowpane her only comfort, while she went over her history with him in her head. It seemed that their relationship so far had been one hurt after another for him, and she listed them each to herself.

Her unfair prejudice against him when they had become acquainted came to her first. Surely her jesting about his perceived slight of her did not further her family and friend’s liking him. Most especially her mother, who would not change her poor opinion of him no matter what, and who took every opportunity to abuse him to his face.

Then there were her remarks to him about his influence of Mr. Bingley regarding Jane. She thought she may have even been wrong there, as it was clear that Mr. Bingley was now at Netherfield and Mr. Darcy did not try to stop him going, or go with him, even though he knew of it and could have.

Oh, and let us not forget her unfair judgment of his character regarding his behaviour to Mr. Wickham. She could not even think on that subject without revulsion, for it led to so many other horrible insults and events – even to the loss of her own hopes and happiness. And the awful way she had abused him when he had proposed... No, she could not bear to remember that time at all.

But if that had not been enough, she then compounded everything by saying those thoughtless things to Lucy. The result being that he had to hear of it not once, but twice!

She had hurt him. She knew that most surely, and she could not chance repeating that act over and over. She would not. She had learnt from her errors and had grown. She would not place him in harm’s way again - in her way. She would end it tomorrow no matter what. She would free him of the chance of suffering any more at her hands. She must.

She would also free herself in a way. The only thing she could not decide was if it would be more painful to be near him as only his friend, loving him from that distance, or if it would be worse to live her life without him in it at all. Well, she would find out most certainly now. And with that last thought she climbed into bed, willing sleep to come soon.

 

 

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